A few days ago I told a friend I was expressing my opinion. And that got me thinking about the ways, means and why-fors of how I form and express my opinions. I believe thoughts and ideas are all a part of the process of opinion forming. Does that make sense?
In that vein, I read something lately that got my attention. Why? Because the writer was discussing thoughts and ideas. And one of his points struck a chord with me.
“Hangup #4: I don’t want to upset anybody.”
Quote from “Totally Grote” Substack newsletter written by Nathan Grote
I find myself holding back or tempering some opinions in order to avoid offending and/or upsetting some friends. In essence, I’m censoring myself. What the heck is that about?
Everyone has their opinions and beliefs and is certainly entitled to express them in any way appropriate for any given situation. For the most part I do and if there’s an opposing opinion I meet it head on. After all, a good debate is always fun. But when the opposing party rebukes me for that opinion, then off come the gloves. And that’s a whole other discussion, isn’t it?
So, back to the friends thing. As I said, for the most part, I express my opinions but in some situations with certain friends I hold back, in some cases way back. So far back, I think I may be in another room altogether. And it’s really silly to do so. I do it because I just don’t want to get into it with them and possibly end up with hurt feelings on either side. Does that make these relationships less than what they could or should be? Maybe, maybe not. Does it keep the peace? Absolutely.
Don’t get me wrong. I don’t sit there and nod my agreement, by no means. I just don’t agree or disagree. I stay silent. Lips zipped. Eyes not rolling. Nostrils not flaring. I sit with a serene look on my face. If I were a country I’d be Switzerland. And that’s my failing. But I gotta do what I gotta do.
Until the next time.